A LETTER FROM JUDAS ISCARIOT (fiction)

Judas, from the clan of Kerioth, a place in the city of Judea. Also privileged to be amongst the first disciples of Jesus Christ. To the Church of the last days, endowed with more grace and full of the Holy Spirit which I never received. Grace to you and peace be multiplied to you now and always.
I clearly understand that I am of negative significance in the history of Christianity and nobody likes to be associated with me or named after me. It was also written that it were better that the man who will betray the Savior was never born. It is true that I fulfilled a negative part of the redemption process but permit me to briefly give you my own side of the story.
Serving Jesus is the best thing that can happen to anyone. Ordinarily, I came because I was tired of the oppression from the Roman rulers, the tax paying and the harassment from the Roman Soldiers. So when I heard that He is the king of the Jews and was popular, I was interested. Just like some of you who have joined the church because of personal needs like protection, association, provision etc., so I also joined the multitude. Getting close to Him and hearing His soul reviving words made me see life from another angle. He explained the scriptures more than all the Pharisees and I loved the way He confused them with parables. Even though I didn’t bother about the meaning of the parables, I just loved the drama.

OUR MEETING.

When He decided to select His disciples, I never thought He had me in mind but He chose me because His mercy endures forever. He picked me from miry clay and set me to sit amongst kings. He is a man that sees the good in people, even when they don’t see such good in themselves. A “Nobody” like me was asked to be the money keeper for the greatest master. I was in charge of welfare. I took care of what everyone ate and drank. I was a church leader; I served like most of you serving today. I was like a deacon, a choir leader, a drama leader, a chief usher; I was a dedicated and anointed member. Those of you who are proud over your small anointing have seen nothing. You know nothing about abundance like seeing five loaves of bread and two fishes multiply right before your very eyes, turning of water into wine, raising of the dead, casting out demons, great miracles and so many unrecorded things. Jesus is a wonder. And yet so humble, so caring and so loving. He did everything to protect us. Jesus even defiled laws just to make sure of our safety. Am sure many of you have not come to think of why He walked on the water. It was not to impress. We were being tossed about by the sea and the wind was against us. We were at the verge of capsizing, He saw it and broke the law of nature, just to rescue us (Matt. 14: 24-25). I had no doubt of Him being the son of God (vs 33).

A TASTE OF POWER

During our teaching and training with the Son of God, He made us understand that we can also be instruments of God’s will to men. So He gave the 12 disciples (including me), power and authority to drive out demons and cure all manner of diseases. It was an honorable and a privileged assignment for me. I also went about healing people and casting out demons. (Luke 9: 1-6)  I too became popular, just like some of you. Imagine me standing over a demon possessed man and commanding the devil out of him, imagine me giving a powerful sermon with so many signs and wonders. Imagine people being touched if I were to sing. Imagine me becoming so rich due to the anointing, of course I was treasurer. If not that the master had said that we should freely give what we had received, it would not have been a bad idea to give more time to the rich people and well-dressed members first before the poor because they are the ones who helped the church’s bank account grow and gave provision when visited.

IN CHURCH BUT NOT IN TOUCH

Jesus made me receive a lot of recognition and respect. I was so busy thinking about the benefits of serving my Master, the fame, the steady dinner invitations, the gifts, the offerings, the praises and more importantly; my office, our cash was growing steadily. With the triumphant entry, I was sure Jesus was the man of the people. Soon we were going to overturn the people against the Pharisees and the Roman dictatorship. We were going to rule. We had power. My private thoughts and anointing made me forget the major focus of redemption. I lost touch of the master’s passion for the dying world. I preferred organizing praise and comedy jamborees without soul saving. At this point I must say that any Christian gathering that is not directly or indirectly focused on exhortation, sharpening of faith and saving of souls is not redemption driven. I was in church but I was not in touch with His heart anymore. When a river becomes stagnant or loses touch with its source, it gives room for parasites and insects to lay egg in it and that’s how an anointed Christian becomes a pollutant to the church. If I was busy with kingdom service, the Pharisees would never have had access to me, how much more gossip to betray my master.
Backsliding is a terrible and gradual process. It starts with procrastination. Procrastinating when to study God’s word, to when you pray and fellowship. From procrastination to lateness and skipping of church programmes. Sometimes we feel we do not have enough time in the day to devote to God but we forget that life is a puzzle and only God can unlock its secrets. Just one unguarded decision can take you to an abominable position.

MY UNRECOVERABLE TEMPTATION
It’s true that I loved money and I was paid 30 pieces of silver to betray the master. Sadly enough, it was not in my intention to have Him killed and that was why I regrettable cut short my life. I can’t really say what I had in mind while making the plans, maybe I had some hopes. First of all, I hoped that they could just free Him after sometime and we will use the money to do other ministry works. Secondly, I hoped that the crowd will react and a revolution will start. And finally I really thought that the Pharisees will fail to catch as they had failed my times before (Luke 4: 29-30, John 8: 59, John 10:39). I tempted the Lord my God. Just like keeping bad a company and hoping not to sin. It’s like watching and reading corrupt materials and hope that it won’t affect your Christian life. It’s like some of you who do not have a single audio message on your phone but keep corrupting contents. Don’t be deceived. Little drops of water make a might ocean. Backsliding is like erosion. I loved my master but I gave time for irrelevancies. Mosquitos lay eggs in only stagnant water. What are you busy doing for the Lord? How many times have you betrayed Him? You can’t mix light with darkness. I hear that darkness has taken a bold stand in your generation and some abominations now stand on the front row. I may not be in the right position to advice you but I know the shame of condemnation.

CONCLUSION
I had no right to destroy the body that God created me in. I do not deserve a place in my master’s kingdom. His judgment awaits us all. It is written of many evil in your time, just as it was written of my time that someone will betray the master. But becoming the one was a choice I made by myself. Just as it is your choice to choose which part of the end-time prophecy you will fulfill.
Do not hesitate to go back to God in prayers and repentance whenever your flesh over takes your spirit. Do not sit back in self-rejection. It is self-rejection that leads to suicide. Any form of self-rejection such as rejection of food, drink and happiness of life is a sign that such a one could attempt suicide someday. It should be greatly corrected, especially amongst children.
Serve with all strength, you may, cause your days are numbered. Eternity await us all.